What We Carry Into the New Year
- Compass Counseling Administrator
- Jan 12
- 4 min read
— and What We Are Allowed to Set Down
By Sarah Rogers, LPC
As one year ends and another begins, many people focus on what they want to change or achieve. But before setting goals or resolutions, it can be just as meaningful to pause and reflect on what you are carrying forward—and what you no longer need to hold.
Emotional weight, expectations, habits, and beliefs often follow us into the New Year unless we intentionally acknowledge them. The transition into a new year offers an opportunity not only for growth, but also for release. Understanding what supports your well-being and what quietly drains it can help you step into the year ahead with more clarity and self-compassion.
What People Often Carry Into the New Year
Many individuals enter the New Year carrying unresolved stress from the year before. This may include lingering burnout, grief, disappointment, or pressure to “do better” next time. While reflection can be helpful, constantly replaying what went wrong can prevent emotional rest and renewal.
People also carry expectations from family, work, and society about productivity, success, and happiness. These expectations can turn the New Year into a performance rather than a fresh start. Research shows that chronic stress and perceived pressure can significantly impact emotional and physical well-being over time (American Psychological Association, 2020).
Not everything carried forward is harmful. Many people also bring resilience, lessons learned, meaningful relationships, and personal growth into the New Year. Recognizing these strengths is just as important as identifying what feels heavy.
What You Are Allowed to Set Down
Unrealistic Expectations
You are allowed to let go of the belief that the New Year must bring dramatic or immediate change. Growth does not have to be visible or measurable to be real. Releasing perfectionism can reduce stress and make progress feel more sustainable.
Guilt Around Rest
Many people feel guilty for slowing down or prioritizing rest. Rest is not a reward that must be earned—it is a basic human need. Letting go of guilt around rest supports emotional regulation and long-term mental health (Neff & Germer, 2018).
Old Comparisons
Comparison often intensifies at the start of the year, especially through social media. Measuring your progress against others can lead to dissatisfaction and self-doubt. You are allowed to set down comparison and focus on your own pace, needs, and values.
Emotional Burdens That No Longer Serve You
This may include unresolved resentment, self-blame, or the belief that you must carry everything alone. While not all emotional weight can be released immediately, acknowledging that you deserve support is an important step toward change.
Choosing What to Carry Forward Intentionally
Rather than focusing only on letting go, it can be equally important to identify what you want to carry with you. This might include self-awareness, healthier boundaries, coping skills, or a commitment to caring for your mental health.
Intentional reflection allows people to mo
ve forward with purpose instead of pressure. Research suggests that self-compassion and intentional self-reflection are associated with greater emotional resilience and psychological well-being (Neff & Germer, 2018).
How to Practice Letting Go in Realistic Ways
Letting go does not require a dramatic moment or symbolic gesture. Often, it happens through small, consistent actions such as:
Journaling to process emotions
Setting or reinforcing boundaries
Limiting self-criticism
Allowing yourself to rest without justification
Seeking support from a therapist or trusted person
Talking with a therapist can help process what feels heavy and clarify what you are ready to release—at a pace that feels safe and manageable.
Conclusion
The New Year does not require reinvention. It offers an invitation to reflect, choose, and move forward with awareness. You are allowed to carry what strengthens you and to set down what no longer serves your well-being.
By honoring both, you create space for a year rooted in intention, balance, and self-respect.
FAQs
At Compass Counseling and Associates, we hear from many of our clients about questions about how they can address their mental health. Below are some common questions we hear and help with for our local families and couples.
What does it mean to “set things down” emotionally in the New Year?
Setting things down emotionally means acknowledging patterns, expectations, or beliefs that no longer support your mental health and giving yourself permission to loosen your grip on them.
Is it normal to feel emotional or reflective at the start of the year?
Yes. Transitions naturally bring reflection. Many people experience heightened emotions as they process the past year and anticipate what’s ahead.
How do I know what I should let go of?
Pay attention to what feels draining, heavy, or rooted in pressure rather than values. Therapy can help clarify what is ready to be released and what still needs care.
Can therapy help with New Year reflection and emotional release?
Absolutely. Therapy provides a supportive space to explore emotional patterns, process stress, and intentionally decide what you want to carry forward.
What if I’m not ready to let something go yet?
Letting go doesn’t have to be immediate. Awareness alone is meaningful. Growth often happens gradually and with support.
References
American Psychological Association. (2020). Stress in America 2020: Stress in the time of
Neff, K. D., & ; Germer, C. K. (2018). The mindful self-compassion program: A randomized
